Is Bumble my favorite dating app? No, but it is the only one that I know of where girls must send the first message. Instead of giving guys a hard time with their lack of creativity I thought I’d give the ladies some tips. If you’re in dire straights where your perfect match will expire if you don’t say something immediately and you can’t think up the perfect opener then you have my permission to “Hey” them, otherwise try to do better! People notice and appreciate individual attention.
Messaging on Dating Apps
- The best openers have a question that can be answered within a sentence or 2 max. What brings you to LA? Wow your job sounds cool how did you get interested in that? Can have complex answers and are better asked on the date itself.
- Try your best to ask them a question about something specific to their profile- people like the individual attention and don’t feel like just another bee.
- Rhetorical questions are not real questions and they’re non-starters. How’d you get so cute? Wow pretty and smart, how did that happen!?
- Small talk questions are non-starters. Big plans this weekend? How was your weekend? How’s your week going so far? How are you? What’s up? How’s your 2017 so far? LAZY. This reads as “will you please do this creative work for me I don’t feel as though you are worth the effort.” I tend to lob these back with a similarly lazy “good, you?” so they can try again.
- Statements are not questions. Wow I thought I was the only one who liked XYZ. Nice eyes. Great hair. You’re from x you must be this kind of sports fan! It’s ok to give compliments or make cute observations, but a question is required.
What to Message a Guy First
Here’s some guys and girls can steal if the persons profile offers you no starting point or direction:
- What would be your first act as President?
- What’s one of your goals for 2017?
- Where was the best place you traveled in 2016?
- If you were trying to escape the cops in a high speed chase, what freeway would you take?
- Would you rather win a Golden Globe, an Emmy, or an Oscar and in what category?
- Have you ever been to [insert place you want to go to i.e. Magic Castle, Bora Bora, the VMAs]?
- If TRL was still on, what song would you call in to vote for today?
- What scares you?
- If you could get one of these for free for the rest of your life which would you pick and why- Uber, Instacart, or Postmates?
- What are your top 3 most used apps on your phone?
- If you could pick any arcade game to have in your house which would you choose?
- What’s the last book you read?
- Where was that picture (from his profile, give specifics to identify it) taken?
I hope these help or at least inspire you! If Bumble isn’t working for you check out my Dating Apps to Try in 2017 post.